Day 96

Today is police department time. I like the connection and the different view of my community. I have change all week in my schedule and the variety is the spice. From the older folks at the senior center to the second graders, to the museum and its interesting visitors, to the PD and the language and perspective changes, to writing about my life, and farmers’ market tomorrow, I have it all here. I don’t have to go elsewhere.

Day 95

Enjoyed walking yesterday. After the days of wet and cold, it was pure pleasure to be outside. What makes a day good for me is contact with interesting people and work that is appropriate and part of a group effort. I found all of that yesterday at the museum. On the walk, I met a couple of old friends and had a catch-up chat that was fun. I will look for that combination again today. Life is good.

Day 94

What I found was something that I already knew. People want to be heard and so do I. Yesterday I gave my full attention to everyone who wanted to talk. It didn’t matter that I didn’t get to say anything because my goal was to be there providing what they needed. The Platinum rule is a good one for shedding ego and finding that I didn’t need their attention. Everyone has a story that needs to be told. 

Day 93

Bob Breszny’s new Platinum Rule: Do unto others as they would like to have you do unto them. Makes perfect sense. Not everyone would like me doing unto them what I would like such as watching too much TV, playing free cell instead of writing, looking out the window instead of looking inside. I’ll keep this in mind today on my wanderings. What can I find in the other person that I can provide that they would like? 

Day 92

Memorial Day Monday. It’s dark and very wet. Brookings has its beautiful Azalea parade and the vets will march here. I may not even get dressed except maybe to have a soak and sweat time. It’s a national holiday and I will think of all the soldiers past and present who would like to have a day off from waging war, preparing for war, remembering war, mourning for a lost warrior, or wondering about the necessity of war.  

Day 91

The day didn’t go as planned and I’m glad it changed. Hollie came after her pool therapy and we walked to town looking for a Mexican lunch. Ended up with nachos and beer and I enjoyed her company. It wasn’t vegan for sure, and every crumb was delicious. It’s wet and dark today and after church, I plan to sort out the closet. May not sound exciting but I am getting a charge out of simplifying my life.

Day 90

I worked hard yesterday on cleaning projects. I love having domestic energy. Sometimes I look at a mess and am overwhelmed. Other times I look at a mess and jump right in like a white tornado. That was yesterday cleaning the messy garage and moving stuff out. Then fine tuning the kitchen shelves making clear spaces with no clutter or unnecessary papers. The yard could use that energy when it gets warmer, I may just jump on it.

Day 89

It was fun to share the party with the kids. The responsible students helped serve and they were great. The more they are given to do, the higher the quality of their behavior. I will and won’t miss going to school. Mostly I do it because I get to be with Hollie. Partly I do it to add my age to their experience. Most of them have no older people in their lives. I have found it satisfying.

Day 88

Today is the ice-cream party for Hollie’s class to celebrate the end of state testing. She says she will never have to torture children with the tests again. Her excitement about retiring from teaching is getting to the place where it is difficult to contain. It’s a good thing to know when to leave any relationship when it’s over. It’s good to go before it becomes a burden that leaves such discomfort that the good memories are gone.

Day 87

I have two containers with baby kale and chard from the farm. It was a cold night and I covered them up to keep the day’s warmth. I enjoy container gardening. Don’t need an acre for my needs and I love to go out and cut leaves, bring them in, and use them. Can’t get any fresher than that. I had two spinach leaves on my pita, hummus, and veg roast sandwich. First full day of vegan foods.

Day 86

Yesterday was a good right from the start. Woke up at 5 ready for action. Had all the morning chores done, the dogs to the groomer, the shopping done before 9. After bringing the fluffy ones home, I went for the two computer items I needed and then went to see Gene. He had fish from a great trip on the ‘pond’ with two friends. I took him to lunch and we had a good time. He’s improving.

Day 85

Filled the hot tub yesterday with solar help. I laid both hoses in the sun and trickled water into the tub. It was actually warm to the touch and when it filled and I turned on the heater, it only took a couple of hours to reach 100. After the dog wash and errands, I will soak and sauna. I have a spa in my back porch and want to get in the habit of using it regularly.

Day 84

Pentacost Sunday and I’m breaking my rule about participating in the service. I agreed to read the lessons. This is not a serious breach and I don’t want any expectations to arise that I will do it again. Back in the 25 years of regular participation, I felt I lost the meaning of the service by the duties I took on. I was busier with the business of the church than of the magic of the Eurcharist service.

Day 83

     

Day of rest after a week of duties.  First a massage and then a plan not to have a plan. A day with no projected product at the end of it. The work ethic can have the day off. I’m not sure why I still feel that I have to justify my existence with work. I can hear my father asking what I did all day and the answer had better be something besides ‘I read a book.’

Day 82

My connection with the police department was a boon yesterday when I reported a prowler. Now we will have extra night patrols. It’s another reminder that privacy and private property are things of the past. Makes me angry that I have to have an alarm system, barking dogs, night lights, and now, police patrols, to feel safe in my own house. I don’t think it’s going to get better without a serious shift in the ways things are.

Day 81

I’m doing “busy” today with a lineup of objectives. Senior Center duty, visit my friend Gene, go to the computer place with questions, buy Cody a new leash as his disappeared, and walk. Carol reminded me of the step counter and yesterday I made over 7700 steps. The goal is 10,000 a day. Today I’m starting over with the physical therapy exercises and I’m on the way with the vegan plan. Sylvie gave me guidelines and I’m ready.

Day 80

At the senior we center talked about how our culture celebrates “busy” and “fast”. I promised to write about the old adage ‘take time to smell the roses’ in small and important ways. On the dog walk we stopped to talk to people we met whether we knew them or not. We took time to say thank you to people who held the door or stopped at the crosswalk and felt the mutual recognition that we share life.

Day 79

         

My son died a year ago today. I still have not read last year’s blog. I’m glad I wrote every day of the aftermath of his death or I would not be able to sequence the events. Hollie and I talked about him last week and it brought back both the good and bad things that happened. She was wonderful and I could not have managed without her. I feel him around here and so does Della dog.

Day 78

78^th day of my 78^th year. So far, so good. Spring has come with color. Yesterday I explained to Sylvie about the weather here. She wasn’t expecting it to be cool all the time. Yes, the marine layer comes in when the heat goes up across the mountains. She gave me ideas about vegan eating and the importance of grains like quinoa for providing protein. Most of the products I had are gone like eggs, butter, and cheese.

Day 77

Mother’s Day. I have nothing to write about. We don’t celebrate Hallmark holidays. I’m sure the church service will be about motherhood. Lots of mother stories in the Bible. I want another long walk and another spurt of domestic energy. May put color on paper again in hopes of getting some part of the image in my mind to appear. I love the sight of the first rays of sun coming over the mountains. Especially on foggy days.

Day 76

The first page lay crumpled up in the round file. It was fun and I may pursue the image and see if I can get the birds to look like birds! Today I’m working in the yard, walking the dogs, picking up around the house. In all, being domestic and enjoying it. The simple ordinary days are just fine with me. The transition to vegan is working too. Shopping is faster when I stay in the produce section.

Day 75

Another gray morning. Where are my sun birds bringing their bright berries of hope? I’m thinking of making a drawing of morning sun coming over the mountains. The problem is getting the image in my head onto paper. The process is more important than the product and I would like to mess around with colored pencils, crayons, and pens. Maybe a whole page of playing with the idea. Good way to add some brightness to a drab morning.

Day 74

It is so important to keep the commitment to nurture the relationships that also nurture me. We are so blessed to have our tea and poetry time. When I let people into my life, they let me into theirs. Sharing is based on mutual trust and caring. We support each other in sharing our creativity. We have a space to play safely and express our interests, our concerns, and the parts of us that need attention and encouragement. 

Day 73

After museum duty, the J Streeters will come for tea and poetry. I have some breads that the Bar O boys made and brought for a sale at the Senior Center. I have Zen tea to serve with the bread. Haiku is still operating in my mind and I’ll share my sun and Billy Colllins moon poems. Deep conversations have renewed my need to stay connected to the important people in my life. More time with fewer people.

Day 72

Did have time on the porch with Chris and greet the new guest, Sylvie.  She’s vegan. Maybe she will give me advice on transiting. The fog is down on the ground and shrouds the neighborhood in blurred lines. Today I may type the Haiku from April. I planned to put the folded poster in the journal and a typed page would be less bulky. I like them and it would be easier to reread them on one page.

Day 71

Went from fog to thunder, lightning, wind, and rain. My energy also went downhill. I have an extra duty at the senior center today and errands to catch up. Tomorrow a new guest is coming and I want to do a quick dust and vacuum just to make it welcoming and cozy. That’s probably the extent of the agenda. I would like to fit in a cup of tea with Chris and a catch up together. Or not.

Day 70

I helped myself. It was 69 degrees in the morning. By afternoon it was 90! I did the untangling of the ivy and wisteria early and avoided the heat. Today the fog is back, cool and quiet. I don’t like heat. Today, after church, I will stock up on more of the future full time eating plan with vegetables and a package of tofu. I’m serious about the change and will begin the mantra , “Food is Medicine.”

Day 69

This morning is calm and clear. I want to go outside and work at cleaning up the little yard. Maybe I’ll even pound a nail into the failing fence. I would like it to last a little longer. The red rhododendron and the wisteria are beautiful and tangled with ivy from next door. I can cut the tendrils and throw them over the fence. I feel the need for cooperation today. No white knight but a helping hand.

Day 68

Feeling blah again. Undue fatigue and low energy. Can’t even win at Free Cell. I will go out, walk to the police department, do what I can, maybe even learn a new thing or two, and the reward for effort will be a massage. I feel that I have to keep a routine and do what I say I’ll do. The alternative sounds like sitting in front of the TV for endless hours of junk. Where am I?

Day 67

It is one of those rare mornings when it was warmer outside than inside. Only happens a couple of times a year. It means looking for a cool shirt to wear to the Senior Center and Hollie’s class. Time is short with the second graders. Maybe six more Thursday afternoons and then I get to retire from school again. The gallery will move and I may not volunteer there any longer. Change is coming. I’ll look forward.

Day 66

Finished my April Haiku writing and I miss it already. It may become part of the morning ritual. I love my long quiet mornings. Best way to begin a day that will be busy with people and activities. The museum opens for the summer season and I will go this morning to spend a couple of hours with Rick Bennett. I feel that time with him is precious. I have great respect for him and enjoy his company. 

May - Senior News

When my teaching career was over after thirty-two years I wondered who I was without the role, the colleagues, the calendar and clock, the planning, the continuous learning, and the mental stimulation. I kind of sank into a doldrum. One morning I woke up wanting to go out and do something. I found the RSVP volunteer coordinator and my first placement was tutoring a Hmong couple in written English. After a few weeks, I said to myself, “Hey, this is teaching and I’ve already done that. What else is out there that can provide new uses of my skills and time?” Through a friend I became a VIP volunteer with the police department and enjoyed the new people and new routine. From there I became a clerk for Teen Court finding community service placements for the teens. Then another friend asked me to work at the Visitors’ Center and that was fun. Talking with tourists and giving directions to our beautiful points of interest was engaging. After a few committees, boards, etc. I found that I didn’t want to be on the planning part of activities, I wanted to stay on the doing part. So, no more. I did stay in public school too, volunteering in my daughter Hollie’s class. It was fun to see her at work and be part of her day. She let me do my favorite things, writing and art. Then I became interested in the Historical Society and wrote a column for the local paper for a while and volunteer once a week. The visitors have stories about museums that they have seen and we come up with top honors for our exhibits. My friend asked me come to her art gallery and show people the works of our local artists. I often sit in the window and write in my journal and watch people. I work at the Senior Center twice a week registering the guests. It’s a hospitality job making sure that the paper work is done and the guests are comfortable. I enjoy listening to the stories. Lots of wisdom there. I asked one of the regulars to go to school with me and teach crocheting to a group of second graders. Steve agreed with enthusiasm, pleased to have a skill to share with others. Everyone has time and skill to share. In these economically stressed times, volunteers are keeping services going. Just look around and there are places that need help. Being part of the community and adding what I can brings me a needed connection to daily life.